Gloomy Day Sunshine

Friday, 19 February 2016

Hey guys, It's safe to say it's been a while. Seasonal Affective disorder has kicked me in the butt this year a bit, I mean it does every year but the difference this year is that I've had a job that's taken all of my energy. doing a job spending the majority of the time dealing with the general public and having to be smiley and nice to everyone when you feel drained is extremely tiring; I tend to spend most of my days off sleeping and watching youtube videos preparing for my next day in work, and the cycle carries on.
That's not to say I don't like my job, I'm actually kind of sad that tomorrow is my last shift because everyone is so nice and it's been an experience but I need some time to get ready for Costa Rica, which I leave for in like 2 and a half weeks (ok that's scary).
But that's why I haven't been posting, I haven't had the energy or the motivation which is definitely sad and I wish I had. But today was different, I spend most of the morning doing nothing, eating and trying to get some motivation to get off my butt and then I started doing a dance tutorial (La la latch - Pentatonix by Lia Kim) which was going terribly. My brain was just not processing anything and so I'd think I had a move and try and do it and my brain was like "what you wanted me to keep that information?" and I was getting reaaally frustrated.
Then as I lay on the floor giving my brain suddenly went "why don;t you do something you're actually good at" and I had a sudden surge of motivation to go take pictures. It was an afwul da out but I didn't really care, I mean it's the first time I've been motivated in months, and I rushed down to the beach and had a ridiculous amount of fun in the rain.




Ok so it wasn't the safest way to take pictures, it started raining halfway through my photos and usually I'd be freezing and annoyed but it made everything better in my head. And I decided not to worry about slipping and cracking my head open on slippery rocks and carry on. I basically skipped home with makeup running down my face and the biggest smile. Simple things.
And it's just hit me that I'm going to Costa Rica i two weeks to look after sloths for 5 weeks and then spend a week on a beach doing yoga. I might cry from excitement.
Though I do need to get blog posts sorted for when I'm away. I'l get onto that right after I've sorted everything for my trip. I just aaaaaah.
So yeah, also I made a weird little video, my motivated self decided it would be a good idea, a message to myself, thought you guys miight like it. It's only 42 seconds long either way. It's all a bit weird today, the photos are weird, my video is weird. I'm just embracing my weirdness I guess.
Thanks for reading!

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