Is it too much to ask to live in a world without gender norms? I mean, apparently.
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Though it doesn’t happen very often anymore, I actually love it when someone brazenly comes up to me and asks “are you a boy or a girl?”. I am aware that they’re trying to be rude, that they think I should fit into a narrow box that they can categorise by gender, but occasionally I don’t fit into their boxes and so they’re basically telling me off. And it’s this little rhetorical telling off that says to me “yes, I’m rebelling and they don’t like it” and I love that.
I mean I would much rather live in a world where nobody cares at all, and while that seems like a long way to never off, I will just continue to dream. A gal has to dream, right?
I’m well away from the days where I looked like a prepubescent boy with boobs and used to get offended when my daily chorus of “are you a boy or a girl?” chimed at me from various different people. Now I just try to push a few gender boundaries by drawing really bad masculine eyebrows on myself, trying to add some square contour to this ridiculously round face of mine, donning my least feminine outfits and saying to myself “you know what world, today you can fuck right off”. Maybe one day I’ll get treading the thin line between genders right, but until that day I will continue to rebel mainly in my own head.
The 32E chest doesn’t really help, because of course to everyone boobs are baby feeders, inherently feminine, sexual, they make you a woman. And while it’s easy for men to become more feminine by donning makeup, skirts, all the outwardly feminine things, how can someone assigned female by everyone around them do the same thing? You strip down to the bare minimum and you’re still female, there’s not really anything men don to become more manly, they are inherently male by their being. And while women are inherently female, they are made a better female with makeup and dresses, heels and garish accessories.

Though I’m not saying it’s easy for men to gender bend, there is a lot of criticism, hate, and violence associated with people assigned as men dressing like women. Whereas when it’s the other way around and it’s people assigned as women dressing, acting, like men they’re often either just treated as tomboys and lesbians, or ridiculed and laughed at.
But I really am sick of being told I have to fit in a box that I don’t even want to fit in. And I’ve been living far too much in my own head scared to actually just be, dress, and act like myself. Scared of being deemed as ugly and weird and having people create problems where they don’t need to be. So as much as this post doesn’t seem like much it is my own little rebellion, yeah I still fit within “female box” to most people but I am trying to get out of it, I'm just having a little trouble.

This post delves very shallowly into the gender binary with all its little constrictions and fucked up ideas. And though a of people want to believe they’re not really there, or that they’re there for a good reason I say no thank you very much.

TL;DR the gender binary is fucked and I don't wanna be a part of that anymore

I’ll probably delve into talking about it more in the future, but this was a big scary step for me so I’ll keep it relatively small, I apologise if things didn’t make sense and am open to answering queries in the comments.